Merry Christmas

Well, I got every done except come baking that I wanted to do, but I can do it tomorrow or even his week.  No biggie.  The stocking are hung on the fireplace, the tree up, decorated with presents under it waiting to be opened.  Tomorrow (well, today now), the children will arrive and we will open gifts, then have lunch.  It's kinda sad that we don't have breakfast together anymore, but life changes from time to time, doesn't it? 

Everyone have a great Christmas!

Crochet Christmas Stocking

I just finished crocheting my first Christmas stocking.  I'm not sure I like the way it came out, but it was my first one and I was creating it as I went.  I'm really hard on myself when I make something because I see the faults with it.  Oh well, I'm learning as I go along!

How Time Flies

I think one or two days this month I have really thought about Christmas.  What I really have been reflecting on are two things:  the first has been my parents.  They made Christmas so magical for us when we were kids.  See, my mother had these plug in candles that she used to put in the windows.  She also had a read wreath she'd hang up.  When they came out of the closet the magic would begin.  It started to feel like Christmas...even though, we were not allowed to put the tree up.  Santa always put the tree up on Christmas Eve.  While everybody at school had their trees up and presents under it, we never did.  But I'll tell ya....going to bed on Christmas Eve with a plain house and then waking up the next morning to a beautiful Christmas tree, lights and tons of presents under it was just magical!  However, as the we grew older and moved out of the house, mom would tell me she wasn't putting up a tree and I would feel sad that she did not continue with the magic I remembered.  Now that my kids are gone I totally understand where my mom was coming from.  I'm just like her.  I have not decorated the house, inside or out, I really don't want to think about dragging out the tree.  It just seems so overwhelming.  There are no kids here anyway to make it magical.  No like in the old days.  And second, how much I miss my kids being young...and I miss the children I no longer have here on earth with me. 

I've got to finish shopping; still have stuff to do.  I'll get it done on time, though.  I always do.  Happy shopping.

Christmas Will be Here in no Time

I can't believe how fast the days are flying by.  It's unreal.  People are putting up their trees..speaking of which, I can't believe the price of trees this year.  Wow!  It's $30 around here.  Unreal.  Anyway, I really need to start baking some fattening goodies...at least some cookies, for sure.  I got the mix and I got the eggs...I need a fire lit under me...haha.  I've got some phone calls to make tomorrow so and a couple of errands so maybe I'll get a little baking in.  The house would smell so homey.  Back in the day my mom used to have this thing...I don't even know what it was called, but it was round like a barrell and it had about six different levels to it, each level was a tray where you could put cookies in.  Every year we'd take a weekend and bake tons of cookies and she'd have that barrell cookie thing filled up.  Yum.  Sometimes memories can be good for something. 

I have to finish shopping....it's hard this time of year.  I wish sometimes I was rich so that I could buy without having the weight of debt on my shoulders.  Somehow this year I have to get the debt down and out of my life.  Well, as much debt as I can. 

Which brings me to new resolutions.  I don't think I made any last year and if I did I forgot them.  Oh well.

Dh and I were in Bob Evans tonight with one of our chapters (we are area reps with the Christian Motorcyclists Association) and my brother and his wife were there having dinner.  Then one of our friends asked if we were twins, maternal twins because we looked exactly alike.  Say what?  My brother has a white mustache...so com'on. 

Sometimes I Feel Empowered, Other Times I Don't

I suppose other people go through this, too.  But sometimes I feel as if I can do anything I set my  mind to; other times I know I can't.  And it's most of those times I continually disappoint myself.  For instance, since October I've been taking a course for becoming a counselor at the pregnancy center.  However, I know I can't commit myself to doing that.  There's a couple of reasons for this.  First, I suffer from anxiety attacks.  Praise God I haven't had really, really bad ones recently like I have had in the past, but I still feel the panic come on when I'm in certain situations.  I'm afraid that if I make a committment and people depend on me wholeheartedly, then I can't measure up, hence the anxiety.  Second, I'm not sure I could handle talking to  women who are abortion minded that, even after I talk with them,  they continued to abort her child anyway.  I would be so upset.  I've heard where some sonographers are the last people to see some children alive before they are aborted.  How very sad.  So, those are two reasons why I know I couldn't be a counselor.  I think I would like to volunteer to file paperwork or do  something with fundraising, maybe.  I just don't know.

Empowered, not empowered.  Hmm.

Oh Christmas Shopping .... fa, la, la, la, la

I'm a last minute shopper, usually.  Today it was time to start thinking about Christmas presents.  My dd said she is not sending me a list with pictures of the things she wants because I never buy the exact one she sends me.  That was an eye opener because I always think I can get her a better one or I see that maybe she doesn't know a different one would work for her better.  When she told me she wasn't sending me a list and why I felt bad.  But yet I thought she is right.  I don't like it when I ask for something and I show a picture of it and yet I get a different one than I wanted.  However, the reason I do that is because I see it as a mother thing.  I want the best for my kids and I rethink what they think.  I am now going to TRY to stop doing that.  Really, I am. 

I started to make my Christmas list for the family.  So far here's some needs/wants:

1)  I would like to have a meat platter.

2)  I would like to have an ac/dc charger for my ipod.

I'm sure I'll add more onto it. 

DD and I are going shopping on Monday.  Sweet.

Tomorrow I have to take my cat back to the vets.  She has tumors in her ears that need cauterizing.  They bleed and when she shakes her head blood goes everywhere.  It's disgusting, yeah. 

So much to do tomorrow.....

Holocaust and the Unborn **graphic photos**

The 180 movie:  http://www.180movie.com/


Some people are mad about this movie.  I want to know what is it that they don't get?? 
   

One picture of a body during the Holocaust.  The other picture is a baby where a late term abortion (partical birth abortion) was performed on.  So what's the difference???  The government wants us to believe that the body at the Holocaust was murdered.  The body that is a smaller person who had his brains sucked out of his head while he was half delivered and still alive is not a person.  Seriously?   The baby body looks just like the big body right down to sex organs so what is it that makes one a person who was murdered and one that isn't a person and wasn't murdered?  I don't see a difference and if you do I'd like to know how you see a difference.

 

The Holocaust is alive and doing well.  Just ask the abortionist's who pockets are stuffed to the gill with green stuff.  Don't be fooled..we need to protect the unborn.

Here Today

The first of the month (Nov. 1st) was the 19th anniversary (if you can call it that) of my daughter's death.  It's been 'one of those' weeks.  You go along doing okay, but when the anniversary of a death comes up depression sorta sets in.  Take the month of May for example.  That's when my daughter Katrina was born.  May has always been a wonderful month for me.  It's just so beautiful..everything is coming up new.  Birds are making nests and having babies.  Flowers are blooming, the sun is bright and it's just a great start to summer.  But then, one day in 1989 my mom died.  And then my beautiful May became one of the those depressing months for me.   And then my mother in law died on Katrina's birthday years later.  How weird is that?  And if that isn't weird enough years after that my father in law passed away in May.  And now May that was once a month I so looked forward to is only a reminder of the people we loved and lost.  And that is how it is with October through the new year. 

Not too much is happening really.  It's just been a slow month (haha).  I am thinking about Christmas, though.  It's time to get to the shopping.    That can be a good thing and bad thing.  :)

Working on my Coupon Binder.....again!

Back in the day (my day) when I started collecting coupons I had a small box I kept them in.  Back then, coupons hardly ever expired...it was great because you could save them forever, well, almost.  But then, I got lots of coupons from my family (they saved them for me) and I had to graduate to a bigger box.  And that worked for a very long time for me.  I just pulled out which coupons I needed and off to the store I went.  We didn't buy anything unless I had a coupon and since I didn't take all my coupons with me I only bought what I coupons for.  I thought I did pretty good at it, but I don't know.  I'm not nearly as good as some of the 'queens' of today.  I try, I really do.  But.....

Then the years rolled by, the kids moved out and I stopped couponing.  Dh and I would just go out and eat..it was easier because it was just the two of us and I didn't have to spent hours in the kitchen preparing food.  But then a few years ago, when the ecomony fell, gas went up, well, I found my coupon box and decided it was time to get back doing this.  So I used my box for awhile and then I went online to see how couponers were saving their coupons and everyone was using a coupon binder.  Oh my goodness.  Whatever had to the index card boxes we used to keep things in?  LOL....okay, so I ordered me a biner online and started setting it up.  I thought it takes much more time filing my coupons then putting them in a box.  But, I got it all done and took it to the store a few times and I felt it was so bulky.  And truly, I was sorta embarrassed to carry this huge note book around with me. I don't know why.  Once I took it with me and my daughter shopping and my daughter was making fun of me and saying how embarrassed that looked.  Ok, I know she was teasing me, but still, it was weird. 

So, I went to Staples to see if I could find a smaller binder and I did find something that I really liked a lot.  I made it work; it as small and easy to carry around.  I could fit quite a few coupons in it, too.  But last night I was clipping coupons...online coupons, paper coupons and then I had too many to fit in my small binder.  Frustrated, I looked at that huge, green binder and I said to it, "well binder, it looks like we are partners again" and here I am working to transfer all my coupons to the big binder again.  I think I drive myself crazy!

You can see my small binder at the top of my big binder.  Now, I have to find a new used for it.  LOL 

I've been using coupons for just about everything.  As soon as I get my receipts together I'll post my savings.